If you’re shopping for an engagement ring, congratulations! Getting engaged is a significant milestone for you and your loved one.

But engagement rings can also be a considerable expense, so you want to make the right ring choice. There are many factors to consider, which can make ring shopping a stressful experience if you don’t know what to look for.

In this step-by-step guide, we’ll go over how to settle on an engagement ring. Here’s what to do:

  1. Set a budget

Before you do anything else, establish a ring budget. Traditional advice says to spend two or three months worth of your salary on an engagement ring. However, such advice is rooted in marketing campaigns intended to get you to spend more.

Instead of committing a specific percentage of your salary toward a ring, sit down with your significant other to go over your financial situation together. Take into account all of your combined debts and upcoming expenses (e.g. the wedding, honeymoon, new home, etc.). 

An engagement ring shouldn’t become a financial burden. Its primary purpose is to commemorate the engagement and symbolize your love and commitment.

2. Choose a stone and style

Next, choose a ring stone and style. Engagement rings tend to have diamonds, but you can also opt for diamond alternatives like moissanite, topaz, opal, sapphire, and more.

Engagement rings also come in a variety of styles. The best thing to do is to notice your loved one’s jewelry style. She may be into a vintage look or a more modern one. There are also many unique engagement rings out there she may like.

When in doubt, just ask her. And if you’re keeping the proposal a surprise and are worried asking might ruin it, ask her family or close friends to help you.

3. Learn the 4 Cs of diamonds

If you choose to go with a diamond ring, you need to learn the “four Cs.” These are the diamond cut, color, clarity, and carat. Here’s a breakdown of what each means:

  • Cut: This refers to the diamond shape. Diamonds can be cut into many different shapes, including round, heart, oval, pear, emerald, and square (aka princess) shapes. Unusual shapes are often less expensive than the most popular ones (like round). It’s also important to note that the quality of the cut has the greatest impact on the diamond’s overall beauty. So never sacrifice cut quality.
  • Color: This refers to the many hues that diamonds come in. Diamond color is graded on a range from D to Z by the Gemological Institute of America (GIA) and 0.0 to 10.0 by the American Gem Society (AGS). On one end of the spectrum are colorless diamonds, which are the most rare. On the other end are natural colors like yellow, blue, red, or pink. 
  • Clarity: This refers to how many outer blemishes or inner “inclusions” a diamond has. Most diamonds have some imperfections, but they can usually only be seen with magnification. The clearer a diamond is, the more expensive it will be.
  • Carat: This refers to a diamond’s physical weight measured in metric carats. One carat equals 0.2 grams and is subdivided into 100 points. The higher the number, the heavier the diamond. If your significant other values diamond size, choose the largest carat that fits within your budget. But remember, quality is more important than quantity. Also, carat weights that include decimal points (like 1.1 or 2.3) tend to be less expensive than round number carat weights (like 1 or 2) because they are less common.

4. Get your significant other’s ring size

Once you settle on a stone, it’s time to focus on the band. Start by finding out your significant other’s ring size. If you get a ring that is too small, it will cut off her circulation. But if you get one that is too big, it’s likely to fall of her finger and get lost as a result. The ideal fit will be snug but comfortable.

If you’re unsure about your significant other’s ring size and you want to keep the proposal a surprise, ask her close friends and family. If they don’t know, enlist their help in finding out.

5. Choose a metal for the band

At this point, it’s time to choose a metal for the band. You have many options here: yellow gold, white gold, silver, platinum, rose gold, and more. 

The metal should complement the stone. Keep in mind that some metals are easier to scratch than others. For example, tungsten is the most scratch-resistant ring metal. However, your significant other may prefer a more classic gold look. As always, choose the ring metal that she would most like.

6. Find the right setting

The ring setting refers to how a stone is set or mounted onto the metal band. Again, there are many options here: solitaire, channel, bezel, halo, prong, three-stone, and more. 

Choose a setting that best highlights the beauty of the engagement stone. The setting is to the stone what a frame is to a picture or piece of art. 

7. Verify the diamond certificate

To be sure of a diamond’s quality, verify its certificate. Diamonds are certified by the Gemological Institute of America (GIA), American Gem Society (AGS), or International Gemological Institute (IGI) according to the four C metrics: cut, color, clarity, and carat. 

Having a certificate from at least one of the above organizations helps guarantee the diamond you are purchasing is as advertised. 

8. Negotiate for the best price

Lastly, try to negotiate for the best price. Whether you are purchasing a diamond ring from an online marketplace like Etsy or a brick-and-mortar store, try to look for discounts wherever you can. Most sellers are willing to work with you on a price since an engagement ring is typically a large purchase and vendors want your business. 

If you’re not comfortable with the price tag, consider waiting until you find something better or until the seller lowers their asking price.

Ultimately, you should choose the ring that your significant other most likes that still fits within your budget. If you can get something she loves, that’s all that matters.